Do NOT Call Me If…

In the past, I’ve written about what private eyes can do. But some still do not know.

Many ask if I will do illegal or unethical things. I won’t.

Stop calling me.

In fact, do NOT call me if:

1. You want a hidden GPS unit installed on your spouse’s car. It’s illegal unless the car is owned by you (the person making the request) and you’ve signed my contract allowing me to do it.

2. You want me to wiretap a phone or bug your house. Under Federal law, at least one party must consent to recorded phone calls. It’s why you hear, “This call may be recorded for quality assurance or training purposes,” on many customer service lines.

3. You want to know how much money is in a person’s bank account. Under the Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act, accessing bank account information as a third-party without consent is illegal. Meaning, I won’t use social engineering, pretexting, or phishing to access this information.

4. You want a credit report or credit score. It’s illegal for a private investigator to access credit history without a consent form. For employment and tenant screening purposes, the Fair Credit Report Act allows access, but without a signed release, no luck.

5. You want me to friend-request someone on social media to access their private information. If it’s not publicly available, we won’t do it – it’s an invasion of privacy.

6. You want videotape inside a private location. Again, an invasion of privacy. Filming through a house’s window or while on private property is off-limits. Public venues like grocery stores, sporting events, parks, or shopping malls are okay.

7. You want medical records. Ever heard of HIPAA?

8. You want access to private info on a cell phone. Again, without consent, I can’t get access to texts, emails, phone call logs, pictures, or anything else.

9. You want me to arrest someone. Isn’t this obvious? I’m not a police officer. In fact, it’s illegal for private eyes to carry badges, impersonate law enforcement officers, or even allude to being cops.

10. You want me to break into private property. It’s called trespassing and it’s illegal.

11. You want me to compromise my integrity. In addition to running a successful business, I’ve been practicing investigative work for over 12 years, I have a secret clearance and a Master’s degree.

My clients include law firms, insurance agencies, risk management companies, and specific individuals.

Most importantly, I’m a father of two boys. If you think you can get me to do something illegal that’ll tarnish my reputation with them, think again.

Don’t Call.